There's a lot that's weird about downtown Greensboro. And there's a lot awesome about downtown Greensboro. We don't know how does it, but they manage to combine both in one crazy, lumpy margarita that we don't mind downing as fast as we can before bolting out the door. (In the AWESOME department Rum Runners has a Sunday Bloody Mary BAR, which can get even the most blasé alkie in your group excited about mixing shit into their drink. )
This Sunday we went to R.R. for aforementioned bloody mary bar, only to find that we were three hours and fifteen minutes too late. (Yeah, you can only get your custom drink on till 4:00) But Rum Runners is so they had an even better deal to replace the one they shut down- $2.00 highballs!
Drinks in hand, Amanda and others in our party noticed a breeze blowing. (Inside.) It was a hurricane-like breeze, so we looked up to see if someone had left the roof open, or if we were in a production of Miss Turns out it was a ceiling fan, but here's what we noticed. The Rum Runners corporate decor aims to evoke something like this:
Thatched roof Key West watering hole
But, we didn't quite feel it.
We did, however, get a strong vibe:
Which was enlivened by a soupçon of frat house panache:
But overall, we found the whole experience of the outside/yet still inside theme to be completely reminiscent of our favorite
Before we bolted our Absolute Pear and sodas, we managed a couple rounds of THIS:
(We are pretty sure this is the Rum Runner's national anthem)
This is not so much Breaking News as it is Recent News, but it is news nonetheless that LOCAL CITIZENS ARE SAVING THE WORLD. And by the world, we of course mean Greensboro.
Something must be distracting the News and Record from reporting on actual world-shaking news like this, so you have to read, of all things, to find out what the Council voted on last night.
So, what happened at Melvin Municipal that could get us so excited? Over 70 Springfieldians showed up to support theAnd Mayor Holliday signed! Cool cities, cool mayors, cool kids, and people saving the world!
506 West Franklin Street, Chapel Hill, 27516 Cost : $8
Seriously, we love this band. Maybe more than we love ourselves. (And that's a lot! Thanks to .) Every time we go to one of their shows we up and That's how good they are. Their was awesome, and their new album is even awesom-er! (There's a song called "Sex Ladder" hello.) Their sound is a blend of plinky plonk, drum machine tribal thumping, and gently sculpted vocals. check it out- don't shout. (If you have expired car registration and you feel like Dr. Richard Kimble running from Tommy Lee Jones when you drive across county lines, then go to other show instead- it's local and should be pretty computery!)
FYI, the Local 506 is a private club, so you have to T'REE days in advance. Fucking North Carolina legislature continues to legislate more shit up (and around) our asses...
There are few things in this world that we love more than a good old-fashioned field trip. We think it's safe to assume that luxurious charter buses, frozen boxes of Hi-C, and museum-based edutainment motivated more school attendance than the promise of in a distant and abstract future ever could.
So, being the bon vivants that we are, last weekend we took a fresh stab at field tripping. After turning out our pockets only to see that we didn't have enough scratch to get us even halfway to we realized we wouldn't be leaving the confines of Guilford County. After just a little pissing and moaning about our un-rich state, we decided to and make the most of our own local playground, Greensboro. And if you have access to a car and some cash, you too can spend your in...
Fanta-City!
The Triad's international shopping, entertainment and cultural center
With only a vague, yet intense, desire for bubble tea and a hazy notion of what the hell Fanta-city even is, we from the hot newly paved asphalt of the Fanta-lot into the most prominent door we could find. The first good omen of the day was propped up against that door:
We checked out the Fanta-stickal before we got there, so we were able to compose a short shopping list.REALLY! You will be graciously offered installation of a Korean language pack and your mouse will trail a glitterous rainbow of stars all over the page- it's pretty fucking magical and it got us really excited about Fanta-land before we even got there.)
Since Fanta-city, true to its name, is set up like a town square of pan global shops, each one a magical portal to another culture, we decided to get a lay of the land before we got tit-deep in shopping or accidently locked ourselves in an unfinished community meeting room. We spotted a barber shop, a day spa ($35.00 mani or pedi), and this lovely outlet on our first spin around the block:
The inside of Fanta-city reminded us of hospitals, airport terminals, and the hallways of brand-new suburban high schools. (From the outside Fanta-city kind of looks like a Chi-Chi's restaurant-cum-bus stop.) Oh, and since we're ladies, we checked out the bathrooms. They are both HUGE (we mean more stalls than the recently departed Flying Anvil had) and clean. Our two favorite features in a bathroom! They also have the look of bathrooms that are not heavily used, but more on that later.
The next "stop":
The words "empty classroom" best describe the Dream Bus Stop, but OH it has already inspired. Aparently, the Maryland-based Dream Tours has decided to grace Greensboro with a stop on its cross-country gypsy railroad runs connecting Hotlanta to NYC via D.C. Can you cruise the east coast, hopping from Chinatown to Chinatown for less than a 100 bones? Dear readers, we are counting on it.
We think everything on this whole shelf was a Central American cure for foot fungus. That shelf was one of our favorite TINGS! (See "Ting" in photo.) Since this particular store was we pledged to come back later so we could pick up some tomato shampoo and conditioner that had a drawing of a ninja on it. There was sooo much in this store we wanted to buy!
T'inking about Ting made us thirsty, so we stopped at the Indu Convenient Store for, what else,
Fanta and phone cards. And some cardamon pods. And some powdered pomegranate, pickled mango, frozen naan, and
The outdoor tables also offer a nice view of West Market. Indu Market has everything you need to create an Indian meal, or just chill.
Having refreshed ourselves and purchased our fill of $5.00 phone cards, we brought our thinning wallets into Creative Fashion.
Cute, right? And it was ALL TAX-FREE! (For that weekend only, sadly.) Which made it even cuter. We found (celebrities wear them, so they must be slutty high quality), fabulous SHADES, and a brand of jeans from Canada that we haven't even heard of. It's more than Creative. It's inspired.
Speaking of fashion...
And yes, there is Tae Kwon Do at Fanta-city:
Perhaps more important than or Martial Arts, (though, god knows, they are two of the most important things in this world) is the Fanta-food court. It is, of course, pan global. It is also a lot like a church fellowship hall. We felt so relaxed in the cafeteria-like setting, we forgot to take a picture. Picture it: Asian cafe (Malaysian food, we think), Japanese Hibachi place, Taste of Thai Express, Fresh Spot something (smoothies, fruit, sleek green tiled decor), and a soon-to-open pizza place. We totally felt like we were in L.A.! Except there was a lot less
And that bubble tea?
We found it!
Good god, we love those big straws. And at U and J Coffee and Cafe, you don't have to elbow past a crowd for a cup! (Hopefully, that will change and they will be as busy as a bubble tea hut in this should be.) We even got an adzuki bean bun, which we couldn't eat in its entirety. But that seemed beside the point of just being able to buy it. It was a good thing we didn't find the part of Greensboro Chinatown that sells mogwais. If you spill bubble tea on one,
At the end of our fabulous and edutaining field trip, we surmised that Fanta-City covers the following cultures: Thai, Korean, Mexican, Indian, Southeast Asian in general, African, South American and that's all we got to before we ran out of money, so we'll leave it at that. The main thing that puzzles us is how the whole thing got built and filled with office furniture and merchandise and how long it can possibly stay that way! It was a Saturday, and we saw a total of four other people who were not Fanta-employees. Even the bridal store and baby clothes emporiums were empty, and this was during the tax-free weekend. are involved in financing Fanta-city, but we have no idea how many international investors are betting their chips on this chunk of West Market.
The whole Fanta-city experience far exceeded our expectations, though they were admittedly non-specific to begin with. Nonetheless, our fervent prayer to the retail gods of Greensboro is that Fanta-city takes off and blows the fuck up! Because who needs a Chinatown when you can have a whole Fanta-city!!!! As soon as our first toe touched that hot parking lot we felt like we were home. It was arrival in Israel. If you have a chance to go, we think you'll feel the same way too.
This is my land!
Special thanks to local dramaturg and yachting enthusiast Clifford Sterling III for keeping this field trip hot, spicy, and edutaining.
This Saturday, May 12th you must beeee at the FlatIron. Some AWESOME bands will be playing and we can't promise that we won't them. Come out and see the Embarrassing Fruits, Blank Blank, and some other musical groups that have said, wait a second, fuck Brooklyn, we're staying right here.
On behalf of all of the Vegan Vampires, Drugged Out Pumpkins, and Labia Like Chairs in the Piedmont I would like to thank the and parateners in crime Health and Saurus for throwing the most Luxurious Aril 20th jam this side of
In the coming days, we will post the audio from that very special evening so that all of you can indulge in the fantasy and frenzy experienced on Friday night at
In the meantime, enjoy this KICK-ASS clip of performing Justify My Love during her (Watch her turn against her lace at the end!). Because it is Awesome and you deserve something AWESOME to watch while you wait for something awesomER to arrive!
Friday the 13th, we avoided curses and bad luck and topped off an incident-free day by catching the WUAG sponsored show on the Stone Lawn at UNCG. We are going to launch an investigation of this "lawn" since we spent several hours there, but still don't know if it is made of stone, or if it actually exists.
The Bands: and The Sounds: referencing decades past (60s and 80s respectively) whilst forging new and enduring forms from musical scrap metal The Highlights: (they're easy to read, like Highlights Magazine!)
*The lawns of UNCG are well cared for, and the grassy, springy topsoil is good for dance moves that would otherwise be impossible or banned on hard surfaces (and probably should be banned anyway!) Headstands were even attempted. And regretted....
We love to DANCE!
*Rhythm and pitch were spot on from the Topbuttons. Their playing is tight!
*Current cast of the 'Buttons includes Adam Thorn, Tim LaFollette, and Michael Sileno. Speaking of casts, a Top Buttons show is a lot like a well-rehearsed West Side Story. Their talent shines through cause there's never a musical pirrouette out of place.
*We can't wait for Adam Thorn to kick over a big old amp!
*Opening Flower Happy Bird sounded AMAZING- we still don't know how they do it with only the one or two (or possibly three?) people in the band!
*We think OFHB should be on all radio stations all the time. Even the ones the astronauts listen to in They would sound AWESOME in space!
*It was cold like Friday night, but the bands played on bravely, without even a space heater to chase the chill.
The Topbuttons are local, so Triad folks should try to catch 'em again. Check their page, they'll be playing the Werehouse soon! Click back soon to to listen to our exclusive interview with Opening Flower Happy Bird. THANK YOU GOOD NIGHT!
This is a throwback for those who remember the good 'ol days when and were on a , as opposed to their current stint on (And yes, I still watch the shit. DON'T JUDGE ME!).
Below is a tender moment that the two shared on Aaron Spelling's masterpiece of 90's cliché. The clip may be many years old, however Cross' characters both now and then have something very special in common (other than bat-shit crazy).
And that thing is, .
Ladies and gentiles, with no further delay, I present to you………MELROSE PLACE!
We love to DANCE! 
